How to adopt a positive mindset in the face of bad news

Remaining positive can be extremely powerful but might not be so easy for everyone. Two happiness experts explain the best techniques

The news that Sir Chris Hoy – one of Britain’s most decorated Olympians – has been diagnosed with terminal cancer has left the country shocked. 
“He’s a superman,” says Paul Dolan, a professor of behavioural psychology at the London School of Economics. It has also been “a reminder of our own mortality,” he says, “that someone so healthy and fit could be seriously ill at such a young age”. 
Sir Chris has been widely praised for his positivity, having been diagnosed with stage four cancer that began in his prostate and has now metastasised in his bones. He has now been given two to four years to live, and despite this has said that he still feels “lucky”.
“We know that Sir Chris is a very resilient personality from his sporting career, and this is now even better evidenced by his reaction to his diagnosis,” says Prof Hugh Koch, a former clinical psychologist and an expert in happiness and wellbeing. 
“We also know that thinking in a positive way can be very powerful when it comes to managing low mood and extremely difficult life events.” 
“Death is the only certainty in life, and existential dread is something that none of us are taught how to cope with,” adds Prof Dolan. But as author of the best-seller Happiness by Design, he knows that mental wellbeing can be maintained even in the face of news like this. 
No one with a terminal illness can be expected to be happy all of the time, especially when their diagnosis is fresh. Trying to look on the “bright side” and find silver linings straight away can add strain at the most difficult of times. 
“It’s important to acknowledge the horror and pain that comes with a terminal diagnosis,” says Prof Dolan. “There are times when it’s appropriate and proper to feel awful, and it’s important to recognise that circumstances are awful and tragic when that’s the truth.” 
It can be particularly helpful to have affirmation of that from others, “who often don’t know what to say” and may say nothing at all. Hearing a simple “I’m so sorry” can help to affirm that this is truly bad luck. 
“When it comes to end of life care, and existential dread, there can be this idea that to accept the way things are is a sign of weakness,” says Prof Dolan. 
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“But I think it’s the complete opposite. The powerful narrative of having hope dominates and that can be helpful, but the quicker that people can accept the facts, the sooner they can begin to move on.” 
Many like Sir Chris will be hopeful of the new treatments for cancer and other illnesses that are in rapid development – a real cause to be happy. But “the danger is that this can become false hope, which can make things harder”.
To begin to be happy, then, “take a deep breath and say, this is going to happen”. 
Staying “in the present” is the cornerstone of remaining positive in the face of terminal illness, says Prof Koch.
“Over the weekend, when this news came out, Sir Chris was in Denmark, and he was talking about his expertise in cycling rather than his diagnosis,” says Prof Koch. “Engaging with your interests and remembering who you are is a crucial part of living in the moment.” 
“Most of the time, one doesn’t know how long they’re going to have on earth,” Prof Koch adds. That isn’t to deny the pain of a terminal diagnosis and its weight – he agrees with Prof Dolan that acceptance is crucial – but “it’s important not to be totally preoccupied”. 
Many were astounded to hear that Sir Chris “still feels lucky” after his diagnosis. Reflecting on what has made your time on earth a life well-lived is often key to happiness when facing terminal illness. 
“If you’re sitting in a two-lane traffic jam, you’re always going to feel disappointed when the other lane starts moving and you don’t, and you’re always going to think that you should have been in the other lane,” Prof Dolan says.
Instead, it’s important “to reframe how you see the world in light of what you’ve got to be happy about”. 
“This news is tragic and shocking, but Sir Chris has had an incredible life,” Prof Dolan says. “I’m sure that remembering this will be one of the things that is helping him to stay positive.” 
“You have to keep lifting the weights,” said Sir Chris at the weekend, when asked how he has trained his mind to think positively about his diagnosis. 
Prof Koch agrees. “That means considering how you think about the everyday events you wake up to, and the things that keep you up at night, as well as how you talk about the illness itself.” 
This is a matter of training your mind to allow in only certain thoughts – and it takes constant effort. Often that could mean “focussing on your own positive views of things that are happening in your life in the near future”. 
Turning to others for help in keeping your thoughts positive can also help dramatically. “Knowing that people value, love and respect you is important to staying positive,” Prof Koch adds. 
Many people turn to their religious and spiritual beliefs for comfort at the end of their lives. Not everyone needs to find God to help them cope with a terminal diagnosis – there is “no one size fits all”, Prof Dolan says – but what helps most people is to come to some sort of “explanation” for what’s happening.
“People find lots of different ways of explaining what is a horrible thing to happen,” he says, “and often this is a key part of how they process, accept and cope with the diagnosis.”
“Other people might naturally find it easier to accept the fact that life can be grossly unjust.” 
As Prof Dolan points out, “Sir Chris has had this news for more than a year now, so we’re getting the year-on account of how he is now living with his diagnosis. There have doubtless been times where this is just devastating, for him and his family.” 
Resist the pressure to be seen to “deal with it well” in others’ eyes, he says, and find your own reasons to be happy over time.